Nine Eleven

Originally publish 9/14/17 

My little cousin asked me about 9/11 and if i remembered it and if its important to remember.

So I sez to her I sez...

I hate to be one of those people that says, “oh I remember when….”

But I do.

Living in Brooklyn at that time, I woke up late for work, and raced around to take a shower to get ready.

I heard a loud boom, thinking it was a giant canister being dropped. My apartment window was open, but I was still getting dressed and so on.

Then I heard ANOTHER loud boom, that sounded different—less like a giant steel canister dropping, and more like a long, loud grumble of thunder. Was it raining??

I HAD to look out the window.

What i saw was not only blue skies but, the most beautiful day ever! 

On top of that, it was primary day for mayor, so I had to race to the local school to vote.

Dressed and ready, i ran outside, and saw an incredible blue sky, almost GLINTING with sunlight! 

I found out later that it WAS glinting—the sun was reflecting off of tiny bits of white ash, in the sky.

There were cars lining the street by the school where voting was taking place, and these parked cars had their radios blaring out their windows. Parked, blaring the radio. Why!!

I didn’t bother to hear what they were saying—i assumed it was all about the election. And I thought it was a little obnoxious to have them blaring news radio like that.

But later found out it was all about The News of The Attack; I just hadn’t bothered to try to hear what those radios were blaring.

When i came out from voting, I looked up in the sky. And there were massive clouds of blackness. Large strips of smoke were pouring into the sky from manhattan, pouring over from a mile away. 

I stopped someone randomly—“What is that smoke?”

“The world trade center is on fire!! — Go down the street and you can see!!”

I shambled down the street and saw a view of the buildings across the river.

These were large, iconic buildings. Very spottable, from all over the city, and in fact even from any passenger plane window. 

The twin towers were symbolic and dramatic. 

And now?

The two towers were BOTH on fire! - just as those people had told me, minutes ago.

Flames were spilling out the sides and up towards the top. 

All I could think was, “How can they possibly put THAT out? That seems insane. Fire is coming out from all kinds of places, the buildings look torn open!”

There was six of us in that spot, viewing that fire across the water. A small cluster of people, commenting and ahhh-ing, like characters in an existential novel. Making comments, quips, and largely staring at the burning buildings in silence.

One guy sitting on some brownstone's steps behind us said, “It was planes. Terrorist planes.”

“What?!” I said.  “Planes?”

“Yes. Terrorist planes.”

I knew right then and there that that was wrong, completely impossible, and just so off-base and ridiculous, I nodded and didn't say anything in response. Why would that happen? Terrorist planes?  Come one. How would that even be possible?  Never happens — and I was sure that that man on the steps was completely paranoid, insane and just one of those weird... I dunno... conspiracists? In an age where that was not even in the public discourse; he was a conspiracist or tale-spinner of some kind!

I ran back home, to put on the tv news.

Not only did they CONFIRM that it was two terrorist planes, but they showed the planes hitting the buildings!—over and over and over. And they repeated that footage, for days.  They showed the buildings collapsing from the fire, and over the next 60 days we in New York watched the firefighters battle to extinguish the fire that continued to burn the wreckage, on the ground and under ground. It was terrible time, with a smell of smoke and demolition filling the air for months!

Its been really really hard, as a New Yorker, to have had to hear the repeated warnings of terror. To have to see the families cry every anniversary for the loss of their family members. Its very very sad to see but yes we will always remember, no matter what.  And yes, of course it is important.

But I also hope we stay equally compassionate and caring towards sufferings in other nations, as well as our local neighbors, in our local communities.  Personally, if I lost someone in the attack of 9/11, I would have been devastated. Emotionally destroyed. Probably for the rest of my life.  But I think its important to mourn and try to move forward.  I think over time we will always remember this day of loss, and day of history.

Its not a memory that I cherish, but it is one that will remain in me for life.