The Screen Writer Writes, for...?

 Yeah, its jerky and judgemental. But I have to conclude my friend Hippie J is not serious about her screenwriting career. It makes me think of how stricken some people are, by the idea of actual success. Including myself. 

Hippie a friend who writes every day, day after day, living off family money monthly stipend... and is in a constant tizzy about trying to find a new agent, trying to get a project assignment finished by deadline to get some other agent... and more.  Its boring to go into, all the neurotic details. But essentially, I think the process of chasing down never-landed agents, of making pitches online, taking classes and seminars about How to Succeed etc... is really a subconscious self sabotage. Because there are many other routes that might be easier - and she refuses them.

I guess I have to be honest and say that I never got over the sting, from an incident of years ago. I was striving to make short films, and to move towards some kinds of expression via video media. Our initial meetup at a Film Makers Social Mixer was nice.  I made a new friend, with her.  I thought it fortuitous, that she wrote screenplays, comedic ones, and I was interested to put people together to Make Stuff - including myself.  

I suggested filming one of her scripted projects, any one of them she was unable to sell. (Which in reality, is pretty much any and ALL projects she's written!).  Her scripts have funny stuff in them, and are written in a strange format that sidesteps a lot of convention. There's loads and loads of dialogue, which I'm sure pleases her to no end. I've been there, I've done that. 

She could toss over one of her scripts, and not have to do much of the work of producing it as a living breathing final film. To me that was a great offer! But so and... anyway... when I suggested we do this filming, her reaction was "OH no - no, I want my scripts attached to 'name' actors. But thanks."

So. 

To me. 

This means, "I plan on going straight to the Top. I have no use for a slow climb!"  And here we are, 13 year later, and she's not even a tenth of a step closer to her goal.  Which again leads me to conclude that she is not interested in Success... but rather, the writing process and the fantastical notion that someone is going to swoop down and note her genius, and bring her on in to hollywood! She does write, every day, so she's no slouch. But its interesting to hear her talk - about how she's going out to LA to meet with producers, and so on.  I'll be dipped in dog shit if she does hit success there. But, I kinda doubt it now. I think I'm just envious of someone who can do whatever they want, pretty much all the time.  So there's that: my personal envies. I guess.