The Flail of Emotions

There's so much drama there.  For her, for me. We're not at all connected on a romantic level, so some of it is even more vexing. I can't always tell which person I'm going to get when I deal with her. A large part of it can be traced and connected to the pot smoking. There's a lot of that.

And there's a deep reflection, self-absorption.

I also wanted to let you know that back when her mother and then father in quick succession died... I spent a long long time on the phone sympathizing, listening, being a good friend. I am not at all sure and in fact am sure, that were the shoe on the other foot... her position would be, I'm so sorry. Now lets move on. 

Actually thats not really fair, but thats how it kind of feels. Like, "ok you have your shit together, I need to have us focus on ME."  And of course, I fall right into such traps.  Thats MY issue—to be drawn to these types. Well, so thats how it is. 

Get There Whenever

I don't know what it is, for some reason hippie Jay has to make it a point to arrive late to everything. She even tells me she's going to be there at 7, but to expect her there at 710.  What is that all about? 

Well I will TELL you what its all about - its self absorption.  If you have to be somewhere, to meet someone(s)... be there at the appointed time.  She has a month of Sundays - in fact, a YEAR of sundays, since she hasn't worked an actual job since the 1990s.  So.. what is it that is keeping such a person back from being ON TIME??? Weird shit, far as I'm concerned. 

Oh the quirks of the human being. I'm petty for cranking on about. But certain things hit the bell- Ding! Red flag red flag... 

There's such a thing as "acceptance". I'm just never very good at it. 

What About My Facebook Posts??

What About My Facebook Posts??

 For some reason, two different friends of mine have been all up in arms, about the fact that were not getting "likes" on social media.  They posted images, they posted videos, only to find that they were getting 2 or 3 "likes".  As opposed to, 457 Likes.  Or even 85 Likes. No, they were getting a feeble anemic response, and frankly?—thats well earned.

I just have to ask them, "do YOU surf around the internet and LIKE posts from people? And what are you actually DOING that might bring others into the fold of your amazing offerings?"   Somehow these friends think they can post things, and suddenly the Worldwide Internet of Facebook will race to their page, and support their creative offerings! 

Naturally, both of these friends have a tiny tiny HUMAN circle of friends, and they are not interested in reciprocating for others what they expect FROM others.  Its so appalling, that I had to write, to vent it out.  Is anyone READING this?? Please "like"! - hahahaha